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March 13, 2009

Part 3 of 3: Judgment

Filed under: Uncategorized — aspensmonster @ 1:05 pm

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Judgmental. Sounds so dirty, doesn’t it? Most everyone I know says it’s a bad thing to be. Google agrees too. The top 10 hits for the query “being judgmental” all seem to be concerned with making you less of it. One even claimed to teach the reader how to judge without being judgmental. Boy am I– Wait. What? Did I read that right? Judge without– yeah, I did. WHAT. THE. FUCK. Setting aside the blatant stupidity of such a suggestion, it is clear to me that our culture has been brainwashed and pussified.

I am told all the time that I’m judgmental. It is leveled at me like an insult or thinly veiled attempt at discourse, as if the statement holds any relevance to the topic of discussion at hand. For some reason people seem to treat it like an argument ender and point negator, and society lets that bullshit slide. It’s an automatic loss. If I’m told I’m judgmental, then I have no valid points and should just shut up. Well folks, shut the fuck up and listen to the voice of reason.

Being judgmental is a good thing.

The problem with being judgmental is that it often results in one particular conclusion being reached; one that is often unpopular and set in tone. This flies in the face of our “tolerant” society. In other words, judgment removes some very comforting ambiguities. Suddenly, we have to own up to some mean but true facts. I think that is necessary.

I think that it is necessary because without it you get the collective shithole we all seem to be living in right now. Teenagers getting themselves pregnant, exemptions for certain religious groups from certain laws, speech zones at universities. But why stop at major issues? I’ve got plenty of personal stories as well. Try this one on for size.

I have a roommate. My roommate was pretty fucking cool. We got along great and he was even a fellow atheist. But then he got a girlfriend. A codependent, lying, manipulative bitch of a woman that anyone could tell was just another gold digging slut. But he was getting head, so I didn’t expect him to complain. Hell, I heard firsthand, much to my displeasure. And then comes the WTF moment: heis interested in a serious relationship. The problem? She has a “serious” boyfriend back home.

Fucking gag me. She wasn’t too thrilled (at first) either. She even talked about it with me once, telling me she “wasn’t like this” and “wanted to change.” So I gave some simple advice, such as stop kissing, stop cuddling, tell him you’re not interested. Simple stuff, right? Oh no, she says that’s “very hard.” Addition, subtraction –hell, his cock– is harder than those things. And that’s saying something.

She later realized that she truly did have him by the balls and chain and has been exploiting that position ever since. I told her that it was wrong to remain in a relationship with my roommate when she was still with the boy back home. I told her quite bluntly that she needed to change and that using the boys like that would come back to bite her. And I was called “so judgmental” and told to “fuck off.” My roommate then proceeded to chastise me about “having to be better than everyone else.”

Nobody in my hall has disagreed with my judgment. But not a single one of them has got the balls to seriously tell my roommate to get smart and his slut to find another sugar daddy. They don’t want to “be judgmental.” They don’t want to “offend” him.

ARE Y’ALL FUCKING SERIOUS? Y’all NEED to be judgmental. This situation IS offensive and your response SHOULD be as well! Nobody has a fucking right NOT to be offended! We SHOULD be judgmental if we give a rat’s ass about his well being! Of course, I’m the evil villain here. Of COURSE! I’m JUDGMENTAL.

Thank god I’m judgmental. If I weren’t, I might be married to an unfaithful, gold digging whore who didn’t care about me at all. I might be infected with god knows what. I might be dropped for the bigger wallet and then brought into court to continue to pay her afterward.

I don’t give a flying fuck in space if I’m offending you. This attitude has plagued society for far too long. This attitude condones bad behavior and removes all social consequence for actions taken. Rather than telling these people to get their shit together, we’re telling them that it’s all going to be OK and to just keep being as irresponsible and flat-out stupid as ever. I mean, we wouldn’t want to be judgmental would we? We wouldn’t want that… right?

Fuck that shit. If someone calls you judgmental, smile, say “thank you” and walk away knowing that you’ve just beat them and they know it. Maybe, just maybe, this world will return to sanity.

March 12, 2009

Part 2 of 3: Experience

Filed under: Uncategorized — aspensmonster @ 3:22 am

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Your employers demand it. Your parents have it. Your children need it. We all want it. But what is it? That’s not a rhetorical question. It’s sincere. Just what is it? For something that is so apparently valuable and overriding, most don’t seem to truly consider what it is. From Merriam-Webster:

a: direct observation of or participation in events as a basis of knowledge
b:
the fact or state of having been affected by or gained knowledge through direct observation or participation

As a 19 year old, I hear about experience all the time. I hear about how much of it others older than I have. I hear about how much of it I and those after me lack. Most importantly I see it used as a tool of discussion. Or rather, a tool to end discussion. Which truly is a shame. You see, I hear people use the word experience. I don’t hear them use experience. It is a shame because those observations and participations are the basis for the word and can be extremely powerful and convincing.

And it’s such a simple distinction! It is not disrespectful to ask to explain what is being called experience. It’s a clarification. There is no justifiable reason to withhold such an explanation. It goes against the very nature of why experience was mentioned in the discussion in the first place, to inform. And yet it is withheld all the time. It doesn’t take a wise man to understand why.

I’ll keep it short. Your use of the word experience doesn’t mean shit. It doesn’t mean anything more to me than it does to those younger than me when I use it. When I hear a 21 year old tell me I should listen because they have “more experience” it is no different than being told “I’m older, ergo I’m right.” If I ever tried that on my subordinates, they would rightfully lose confidence in me as a leader. No one believes that bullshit.

It’s a cop-out. I don’t want to hear you tell me you have experience. I want to hear what the experience is and more importantly how you came to interpret it as supporting whatever position you are positing. Because that is what has you convinced of whatever your opinion is. When you refuse to answer, you might as well not have the experience at all.

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